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“Ha ha ha ha, you are hilarious, Ichigo!” Rukia laughed as he hauled her home.

“I didn’t say anything,” Ichigo sighed, heaving the very, very drunk Rukia up on his shoulder. She didn’t walk straight and nearly slipped every few seconds.

Sure, she hadn’t meant to get drunk. Sure, it was her friends from the living world and the Soul Society who had done this to her. She just couldn’t say no to people. So, when over twenty people offer to buy her a drink, what did she do? She got a drink. And she drank, every last one of them.

And now Ichigo, bless his soul, had to drag her back to his house. He had to drag, the probably illegally drunk, Rukia back to his house to sleep it off.

He looked over to her. Obviously, she looked horrible. The white dress she wore to the party was covered with a red liquid and vomit. She definitely didn’t look as good as she did earlier that evening, when she had entered the bar.

She sure did have a way of surprising him. That was for sure. When she walked inside the bar, not only was Ichigo drawn away from his conversation with Ishida but so was everyone else. They looked as a woman entered.

The dress she was wearing was elegant. It was white with sparkling everything. It went down to her ankles and was complimented with her white, open-toed shoes.

And she was Rukia.

Damn, was all Ichigo could think. She cleaned up nice. Very nice.

“Ichi-kun,” Rukia said, breaking him from his thoughts. He turned to her, the words “Ichi-kun” running through his head. “I—don’t—I don’t feel so good.”

“Do you need to stop, catch your breath?”

She nodded wearily and they stopped. He gently set her on the ground. She sat there, her legs spread far out, her violet orbs clearly swimming in alcohol. “Ichi,” she said, dazed.

“Yeah?”

“I like you.” He stared at her. What? “I like you a lot. Every time I’m around you, I get this weird feeling in my stomach. Like bunnies are hopping or something.”

It’s butterflies, but go on, Ichigo thought amused.

“Sometimes—I don’t know what to say,” she went on. “So I start yelling at you. Funny, ain’t it?” She giggled hysterically at the joke Ichigo didn’t get.

Instead, he got up and held out his hand. “Come on,” he said. “I better get you home.”

She took his hand and leapt up, grabbing onto his shoulder with her free hand. “You’re strong,” she commented as they drug on.

After the war had ended, things seemed to get back to normal. Whatever the hell normal was, that was where things went. Sure, the shinigami didn’t come to the real world as often, and it was always a surprise when Rukia showed up. Something like this, for instance. Ichigo didn’t even know it was her birthday until Inoue called him and told him so.

He had shrugged and found a coat and tie, which also had vomit on it by the way, and went to her party. It would have been rude not to be there, though he did feel he had something more important to do; watching TV for instance.

He saw the clinic in the distance. Good, he didn’t want to drag her all the way back to Urahara’s, it was best if he went there.

You might be wondering how Ichigo got into this situation. That’s right. He had been the last one there. Byakuya told him to take Rukia to her hotel room giving him an address and phone number if anything happened. But nothing would. Nope, nothing would.

Except for the fact that Rukia was drunk out of her mind and saying things that she would regret later. Especially when Ichigo used them for blackmail.

…………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

There were exactly thirteen stairs from the living room to the second floor of the Kurosaki residence. Only twenty-six steps to take. Only fifty-two seconds to get to the top.

And somehow, it took longer.

On their way up the stairs, Rukia lost her balance. She tripped and fell, taking Ichigo with her. They landed in a very, awkward position, to say the least. Rukia was laying half way on top of Ichigo, her dress slightly coming up on her leg.

She giggled and, before Ichigo could do a thing, she crawled on top of him. She looked down and got so close to his face, he thought their noses would touch. “Ichigo,” she whispered, her mouth smelling like alcohol.

“Yeah?”

“You get those bunnies too, don’t you?”

Bunnies? Oh, right. Butterflies.

“You want me, don’t you?” she asked. “I saw how you looked at me tonight. You couldn’t take your eyes off of me. Come on, Ichigo.”

She had a point about looking at her—Wait! No. He hadn’t looked at her that way. He had merely seen that she looked pretty, that was all. And he had taken his eyes off of her…once or twice.

And come on what?

He could feel something wet. He looked down and saw that Rukia was kissing his jaw line. He tried to squirm away but she stopped him, piercing him with those violet eyes.

Okay, so he had looked at her—several times. So, he did get “bunnies” in his stomach sometimes, when he heard her rustle around in his closet, trying to dress or taking a shower, using his soap. What guy didn’t? And sure…he liked her…a lot.

So what?

That didn’t mean he wanted to do this. Of course, his brain was slowing down. The place didn’t offer water or even pop there, after all. That meant, he didn’t have that quick of reflexes. And her touch…it was kinda nice.

So, what did the man do?

He followed his instincts.

He ran his finger up her thigh and she smiled. She kissed his lips at that point. It was the first time she had kissed him, well besides the ones on his jaw. He brought his hands to her back and she ran her hands through his hair, deepening the kiss.

Still on the stairs, they broke apart, both breathing hard. Rukia grinned and took off Ichigo’s shirt and he fiddled with the zipper on her dress. He could hear it going down.

Their lips met again and this time neither one of them wanted to break apart.

But, Ichigo’s common sense knocked in. His eyes snapped open and he stopped. Rukia looked up, clearly surprised. He grabbed her wrists and said, “Rukia, you’re drunk. You need to sleep.”

Her eyes were so innocent, it took all Ichigo had to keep talking. He sat up. She looked over to him, “Do you want me?” she asked.

He hesitated. “Yeah,” he replied. “But not like this. We’ve been through too much for this to happen between us. Come on.”

She picked up his shirt and picked her up bridal style. He walked the rest of the way up the stairs and to his room. Opening it carefully, trying not to hurt the raven-haired girl.

He walked over to his bed, laid her down and was about to leave when he felt a hand grab a hold to his. He turned around to see Rukia staring at him. “Please, don’t go,” she whispered.

His features softened and he sighed, “Scoot over,” he said and she complied without question. He wrapped an arm around her, keeping her warm because the heater wasn’t working in the clinic at this point in time, and he heard as her breathing became softer and slower.

She had passed out. And not two minutes later, he had too.

…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

Rukia woke up the next morning with a mind splitting headache. It hurt to open her eyes, so she kept them shut and snuggled closer to the body beside her.

Ichigo’s eyes snapped open when he felt Rukia snuggle closer. Crap, he thought. This is gonna be bad—he smirked, a thought emerging—better make it worthwhile.

“Hey, sweetie,” he whispered in her ear. “How are you today? Did you have a good time last night?”

Rukia’s, hearing the voice, eyes flew open. She yelped and they both went tumbling down to the ground. She struggled to get out and once she did she saw the shirtless, smirking man in front of her.

“I had an amazing time last night,” he said. “Certainly I wasn’t your first?”

She looked down. The dress she was wearing was definitely ruined. And she felt a bit of cold air hit her back. The zipper was down.

Wait.

That didn’t mean…

The hell?

No way.

Her eyes widened. Ichigo cocked his head to the side, confused, “What’s wrong?” he asked. “Don’t you remember?”

Rukia shook her head. And then she screamed.

He stood up, ready to calm her, if it hadn’t been for that look in her eyes. “Oh my gosh!” she yelled standing up. “I can’t believe you did that! YOU—AHHH!!”

She picked up whatever she could through. That was Ichigo’s math book. It hit him in the head and he stubbled backwards.

Rukia took the opportunity and ran toward the door.

“YOU PERVERT!!” she screamed. “I can’t BELIEVE you would take advantage of me!” She ran down the stairs, Ichigo right behind her.

All in all, Ichigo was glad that his family was away this weekend on a “Father-Daughter Bonding Trip.” He would have to thank his father for that later.

“Rukia!” Ichigo yelled. “Wait! Nothing—ah!”

Once she was downstairs, she threw the phone at him. “I can’t believe you!” she screamed.

“Rukia!” Ichigo dived, grabbed Rukia and pinned her up against the ground. “Nothing happened,” he tried to explain. “I was only kidding. You were drunk and some things got out of hand but I stopped them, okay? I didn’t think we should be doing that.”

The fury in Rukia’s eyes had gone away by then. “I don’t know if I should believe you…” she mumbled.

“Believe me,” he gave her the best look he had. “I’m sorry,” he added.

She sighed. “I guess you’re okay,” she concluded. “But don’t mention this to anyone, got it?”

Just then the door burst open. There, stood Byakuya, eyes wide, at the sight he saw before him. Kurosaki had pinned his sister against the ground. The said man’s shirt was off and he could see that his sister’s dress was unzipped. It wasn’t what he expected to find when he went off looking for his sister that morning, to say the least.

“Holy hell,” Ichigo mumbled.

Byakuya was hoping he wouldn’t have to do this.

He sighed. Why couldn’t the boy just listen and do as he was asked? Was it really that hard? Obviously so, Byakuya concluded as Kurosaki slowly got off of his sister.

Sigh.

This was so troublesome.

“Scatter.”
I don't own Bleach. Just a oneshot that I uploaded for carrietheninja (or Sinister Smirk) for her birthday. I decided to put it here. Thanks for reading.

Comment if you want!! :]]
Add a Comment:
 
:icongothgirl378:
Gothgirl378 Featured By Owner 5 days ago  Student Traditional Artist
Well, he's gonna die. Do like the hilarious ending.
Reply
:iconpadiyaflame:
PaDiYaFLAME Featured By Owner Apr 17, 2011  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
yep. hes doomed!
Reply
:icontoxicrainbow11:
ToxicRainbow11 Featured By Owner Apr 13, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
AHHH ! I loved itt !
Reply
:icondeadblackkat:
deadblackkat Featured By Owner Dec 20, 2009  Hobbyist General Artist
"scatter" that at the end when byakuya walked in was hilarious... but byakuya could neva beat ichigo.
Reply
:iconzapenbits:
Zapenbits Featured By Owner Dec 23, 2009   Writer


Haha!
True that. XD.
Thanks!

-Liz
Reply
:icondeadblackkat:
deadblackkat Featured By Owner Dec 25, 2009  Hobbyist General Artist
hehe... can i ask u somethin?
i am doin a contest to draw a person from my fan fic, Hitsugaya's kid. her name is hishirou. do u think u can draw her? i would but i stink at computer drawing on paint... and i don't have a scanner...
Reply
:iconzapenbits:
Zapenbits Featured By Owner Dec 25, 2009   Writer


I would, but I cannot draw to save my life.
Sorry. =[
Thanks for commenting!

-Liz
Reply
:icondeadblackkat:
deadblackkat Featured By Owner Dec 25, 2009  Hobbyist General Artist
o i forgot this was a fan fic...
Reply
:icondeadblackkat:
deadblackkat Featured By Owner Dec 25, 2009  Hobbyist General Artist
u should read mine. [link]
Reply
:iconzendaflame:
Zendaflame Featured By Owner Sep 3, 2008
LOL!! That was pretty much amazing! X3 Haha, I love it!!! Yeayz!
Reply
:iconzapenbits:
Zapenbits Featured By Owner Sep 4, 2008   Writer


Thanks so much!
I'm glad you enjoyed it! :hug:
Reply
:iconsakurasorceress:
SakuraSorceress Featured By Owner Aug 14, 2008
OMG!So hilarious!I can't stop laughing!
Reply
:iconzapenbits:
Zapenbits Featured By Owner Aug 14, 2008   Writer


Haha, thank youuu!=]]
Yay for awkard moments!^_^
Reply
:iconsakurasorceress:
SakuraSorceress Featured By Owner Aug 14, 2008
You're welcome!Drunk Rukia is awesome!
Reply
:iconichirukifanatic111:
IcHiRuKiFaNaTiC111 Featured By Owner May 28, 2008
Scatter... lmao that was hilarious!!! please write more!!!

~*~*~
When you feel lonely, look at the space between your fingers. Thats where mine fit. <3
Reply
:iconzapenbits:
Zapenbits Featured By Owner May 28, 2008   Writer
=] I'm glad you liked it!
I looooved writing iiiit!=]
Reply
:iconsakurasilverstream:
SakuraSilverstream Featured By Owner Mar 24, 2008
*rolls out of her chair, laughing* I...Can't breathe! This is amazing! I love it. ^^ I'm also writing a seuel to a story of Rukia getting raped (it's on my favorites.) Well actually I'm revising mine. ^^; Once I get that done, I'm planning to write a Titanic story - Bleach Style. ^^I hate to ask this, but would you mind taking a look at the journal called Character list and tell me if there's anything I should change? My friends are of no help to me lol
Reply
:iconzapenbits:
Zapenbits Featured By Owner Mar 24, 2008   Writer
Haha, thanks! I'm glad you liked it!=]
Sure, I'll check it out! I'm glad you want to hear my opinion!^^
Thanks for the comment! [runs off to read journal]
Reply
:iconelemenestra:
Elemenestra Featured By Owner Mar 23, 2008
that was just brilliant just awsome work
i love the end :love:
Reply
:iconzapenbits:
Zapenbits Featured By Owner Mar 23, 2008   Writer
Thanks so much!
I'm glad you enjoyed it!=]
Haha, Byakuya is awesome!^^
Reply
:iconelemenestra:
Elemenestra Featured By Owner Mar 23, 2008
they are all just awsome :P :P it was really funny
Ichigo & Rukia - Idios in Love :love: :P :P :P
Reply
:iconzapenbits:
Zapenbits Featured By Owner Mar 23, 2008   Writer
=] Haha, thanks!
Aw, yes, IchiRuki forever!
Reply
:iconelemenestra:
Elemenestra Featured By Owner Mar 23, 2008
:aww: :aww: ^^
Reply
:iconkazulallan:
Kazulallan Featured By Owner Jan 18, 2008
OMG i laughed for the whole last half. that was pricless! I do like the romantic bits too, though. lmao.
Reply
:iconzapenbits:
Zapenbits Featured By Owner Jan 18, 2008   Writer
=D I'm glad you enjoyed it!!
Have a wonderful week!
Reply
:iconkazulallan:
Kazulallan Featured By Owner Jan 18, 2008
thanks. same to you.
Reply
:iconwee1bee:
WEE1BEE Featured By Owner Jan 15, 2008
That was so freak'n funny!
~lol~
Write more please!
~lol~
Keep up the good work!
*Dies of laughter*£
Reply
:iconzapenbits:
Zapenbits Featured By Owner Jan 16, 2008   Writer
Thank you!!! I'm glad you like it!!
Don't worry, I don't plan on stopping anytime soon. lol
Have a great week!
Reply
:iconaquariuschik:
aquariuschik Featured By Owner Jan 2, 2008
that was awsome!!! lots of detail luved it
Reply
:iconzapenbits:
Zapenbits Featured By Owner Jan 2, 2008   Writer
Thank you!! :) I'm glad you liked it!
Reply
:iconhannible7:
Hannible7 Featured By Owner Dec 17, 2007
I bow to you, i don't i've laughed so hard in my life... that was perfect, if i was a teacher you would be getting a Gold Star for sure.
Reply
:iconzapenbits:
Zapenbits Featured By Owner Dec 17, 2007   Writer
Yay, a gold star!! Thanks so much!! You haven't laughed that hard in your life?? Good, then my work is done. Thanks for the comment!! :]] Have a wonderful week!!
Reply
:iconrangikumatsumoto:
rangikumatsumoto Featured By Owner Dec 16, 2007  Hobbyist Artist
LMAO!! omg rukia should be more drunk often! omg tell us wat happens later please!!!
Reply
:iconzapenbits:
Zapenbits Featured By Owner Dec 16, 2007   Writer
She should, shouldn't she?? Maybe she'd finally admit her feelings to Ichigo. :]] This is a oneshot, so there isn't going to be a sequel. Let's just hope Ichigo gets out alive.
Reply
:iconchappi15:
Chappi15 Featured By Owner Dec 14, 2007  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Omogsh I love it!
Poor rukia got drunk... hehehe
Great oneshot, funny, romantic, amazing (a million other great words).
Make more, their fun to read!
Reply
:iconzapenbits:
Zapenbits Featured By Owner Dec 15, 2007   Writer
Thank you!! Yeah, Rukia got a little drunk... ;)

I'm glad you enjoyed it!! I'm busy with finals this week and I have another chapter in When You're Gone to type but my Christmas break starts soon, I might try something new. Thank you!! Have a great week!! :)
Reply
:iconchappi15:
Chappi15 Featured By Owner Dec 17, 2007  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
You welcome!
I reall did enjoy it! and I already read your new chapter for "when you're gone." It was great! You good at writting romantic scenes!
have a good holiday break, mights coming too.
Merry Christmas too!
I hope to try something new with a story too.
Reply
:iconzapenbits:
Zapenbits Featured By Owner Dec 17, 2007   Writer
Really?? Thank you!! The truth is...I've never been kissed in my life--I haven't even held hands with a boy yet!! So, I'm glad you think so!! You're going to try something new?? I can't wait to read it!! :) Thanks!
Reply
:iconchappi15:
Chappi15 Featured By Owner Dec 24, 2007  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Your welcome!
And, I never kissed or held a boys hand either...sigh... Where in the same boat together.
THe new thing I'm going to try, will not come into play for awhile. I and very, very busy withCHristmas right arnoud the corner. I'm like soo broke with money right now...cry... I'm like so stressed out too, I couldn't finish my next chapter on my fanfic, and I'm afraid I will lose viewers because I'm like super late.

Oh, and your return comment on fanfic, about editing, it did help. Thank you! And yes, yes, you may use that story idea! I would love to have someone like you write it! I once asked someone esle to write it, but when I read it, it suck so bad, I couldn't even see how it related to my story idea. So please write it (begging)! I can't wait to read how you wrote it! Don't worry no one is writting it, so go head, and I'll update my profile saying my favorite author is writting it. Yay!
Reply
:iconzapenbits:
Zapenbits Featured By Owner Dec 24, 2007   Writer
Yeah, I know what you mean. M too. Besides still having to pay 400 dollars on my computer AND getting Christmas presents for all my friends and family...my goodness, I have no money!! Don't worry about the next chapter, I'll still be reviewing and you can just give it to them as a late Christmas present! Just get it done when you can, people will understand. :)

Okay, that's good. I wouldn't want you to delete your story! That'd be horrible. And I was looking at some of it yesterday. 80 reviews and only 8 chapters?!? Wow, you're doing awesome for your first story!! :) And it only gets better, trust me!!

Really?? Wow, it's like early Christmas!!! YES!! I can't even type how excited I am!! :)) Thank you soooo much!!

Merry Christmas!! And gook luck on the next chapter!! :)
Reply
:iconchappi15:
Chappi15 Featured By Owner Dec 24, 2007  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Money...*sitting on sidewalk, holding bucket*...Money for the poor.
I have a few bucks left, but they are going to qiuckly go, and I'm probably going to have to loan some of my dad. My goal this year for Christmas was to buy everyone 2 presents...Big mistake! By the time I get the money back that I lost, it would be Christmas again...sigh...
I know, I' soo happy too, 80 reviews! See, one thing I planned out before writting my story, was come up with an idea that would draw peoples attention to read it, and it worked! Yay! I hope my next really long story will have the same affect. It's kind of funny, I love coming up with story ideas for Bleach, but they usually have nothing to do with soul-reapers, and stuff. I guess some people like reading storys that have nothing really to do with the anime/manga...*shrug-shoulder*...
Since your my favorite auther (and net friend) I will give you a small preview (more like hint) on whats going to happen in the future of my vamp. story. I'm going to be bringing in Renji, since a lot of people wanted him, and he's going to be...special. Hehe Rukia is going to get a little surprise from him, wich will total change he she is. And how is Ichigo going to take this? Jealousie will be in the air a little, and much blood will be sucked...hehehehe^^
Thanks for the luck, I use it!
Ttyl
Reply
:iconzapenbits:
Zapenbits Featured By Owner Dec 24, 2007   Writer
Two presents?!? Dude, I hardly had enough for one for my friends/family!!

You're plan DID work!! When you start a new story, usually the people come back to read more that you've made. That's what happened to me. Of course, you'll probably have new people too. Oooo, now I can't for you to update!! You're so unfair!! :]]
Yes, I shall talk to you soon!!
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